What a depressing month

This post will not win me any brownie points. It isn’t intended to. I never wrote to be popular. Yes, popularity is nice, it gives a temporary high but being honest about how I feel about things…being effing authentic…that matters more to me than anything else….

Woke up to heavy rainfall today which escalated into flash floods Floods in Mumbai…I saw the lane outside my house look like a mini river….why are we surprised…it happens every year. People pay homage to the ‘spirit of Mumbaikars’ and within a day, everything is forgotten in the hustle and bustle of life…much as I love the city, I don’t want to stay here anymore.

Thousands of miles away – Hurricane Harvey wrecks havoc on Texas…you guys have my sympathies…

North Korea fires a missile over Japan and in retaliation South Korea carries out a live drill of dropping 2000 pound bombs from fighter jets and doomsday conspirators scream that ‘the end is near’…well N. Korea has a crackpot as a leader but so do a lot of other nations…one who uses Twitter a lot and another who helped him to get elected while having a shot of Vodka…

China and India end their impasse regarding the border dispute near Bhutan, Indian media calls it a ‘victory’, not sure if it is…but who will check the dragon, everyone is scared to provoke it…my question is why are certain countries allowed to bully others?

The UN is the biggest failure – I stand by this statement. When it comes to strong arming countries who do what they want, when they want…it hasn’t been able to do much…

Violence in Barcelona…my prayers for the families of those who lost someone special as well as a speedy recovery to the ones who got injured…terrorism is something the world must fight as one united body but it isn’t as simple as ‘killing all terrorists’. It goes way deeper. Think of what misery a person …or rather, generations of people have gone through…think of the anger inside them…only once those problems are addressed will terrorism come to an end…

Donald Duck pardons a racist person who is guilty of targeting Mexicans…a white supremacist rally in Charlottesville…I have one questions to ask all white Americans – you aren’t the original inhabitants of your country. The ‘Indians’ are in the true sense of the world. You also migrated from Europe a few centuries ago…so aren’t you also migrants in a way? Don’t bother answering. I don’t want a debate.

I address the entire world who is guilty of this….while it is easy to shut your borders, prevent refugees to enter your countries, please remember that as you sow, you reap. Karma is a bitch. The consequences of your actions will bear fruit someday and the future generation(s) will pay for it. I do not wish ill for anyone. It is just how nature works. How the universe works. And it is sad. Because we think we are invincible but we are not.

Speaking of terrorism…ISIS might have faced a set back but I feel the ones who have survived will regroup and form another group someday…who knows…its not good for the world at large…no form of violence is…

I am sure there are more depressing things which have happened which I could have written about but this is enough…for now…I just hope the people who believe that better things are in store for humanity keep on believing and keep on working towards it. We need more faith in the fact that not everyone is evil…we need more good Samaritans and we need more love…less hate.

Over and out,

Ladyhawk

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Entitled

While you take a sip of your expensive wine…

Feast on imported bread…

I scrounge around in dustbins…

For my children must be fed.

You sleep on satin sheets…

On pillows made of fluff…

I sleep anyone where I’m safe from bombs…

The ground no longer feels rough…

You bathe in bathtubs strewn with petals,

Scented candles and bath bubbles…

Scrounging around for a sip of clean water…

Is one of my daily troubles…

You go to work, come home to your families,

Complain about the heat and taxes…

All I worry about is how to stay alive…

In my world, no one ever relaxes…

How I long for not feeling afraid…

And freedom that’s mine to keep…

Clean clothes, a square meal, a roof on my head…

And a night of peaceful sleep.


Dedicated to anyone who thinks their life is tough..please remember that there are people who are dying due to wars, famine,slavery and diseases all over the world. Be thankful for what you are, what you have. It could all be taken away from you in a flash and then what? Don’t take life for granted. Help others. Volunteer. Donate to the UN and other charities who need, DESPERATELY need money to aid people and countries which are facing a humanitarian crisis. Don’t know what I am talking about?

Peace out,

Ladyhawk

 

Follow Me! Please…pretty please?

Follow me.

Are you on Instagram? Follow me. See my pictures, do they make you jealous? Did you see that I went to Spain? And saw a broadway show in America? And trekked all the way up to Machu Pichu?

My life is amazing. I am sure you want to be in my shoes. ‘What a lucky girl’…I can always imagine you thinking that to yourself every time you double tap on my posts.

Follow me.

Did you see the amazing close up I posted on Facebook right now? I used just a few filters to disguise my pimples and scars and make my hair look glossier and thicker. The angle of my face is perfect. I look like some super model. And yes, I didn’t post a full length picture because then you can see my love handles and that isn’t a very nice sight…I am not proud of my body – so you are not allowed to see that.

But love handles aside…

Aren’t I a beauty? Follow me! Add me as your friend – watch me post about how much I love my DH (dear husband). Oh yes, we fight everyday and I hate his guts but it is essential that he and the rest of my 997 friends know that I love him, our love was meant to be, he is the best thing in my life. Yes, he and you need to know it – every single day. See how happy we are. You can’t see through our fake smiles and the red eye caused by the flash maybe hides how dead I feel inside.

Oh yes, I am living the life so follow me.

download


 

This is a reminder to all who are guilty of this – start living an authentic life and stop pretending to be who you are not, stop it – with your filters and your over sharing and all the fake pretentious shit you are up to. Those who know you, can see right through you and those who do not – well, I don’t think they even care.

A very cynical ladyhawk signs off

 

Free Spirit

I sat under the stars…

Contemplating my life…

An outsider may think its perfect…

To me, it has always been wrought with strife…

I’ve never been really happy…

I’ve never known true peace…

The devil’s constantly whispering in my ears…

If only I could do as I please…

What’s right…what’s wrong?

What’s black…what’s white?

Why can’t I cross the line sometime?

Why can’t I for once NOT be right?

Who makes the rules to rule my life?

Who gets to judge me when I die?

I’m sick of pretending to know the truth…

When my life has been one fat lie.

If only I could do what I want…

If only I could be thoughtless like a child…

No limits, no boundaries, no rules to follow…

How I long to run free and wild.

 

Lera Lynn – Lately

Came across this song when I was watching True Detective 2. I would recommend the series by the way. I’ve seen season 1/2 and they are a treat for people who like drama/crime series.

I claim no rights to this song, posting as a fan. Lyrics below:

Lately I’m not feeling like myself
When I look into the glass I see someone else I hardly recognize this face
I wear when I stare into her eyes – I see no one there
Lately I’m not feeling like myself

Lately I’ve been losing all my time
All that mattered to me slept my mind
Everytime I hit another town strangers appear to lock me down
Lately I’ve been losing all my time

The mystery that no one knows
Where does love go when it goes?

Lately words are missing from now on
Vanished in the haze of love gone wrong
There’s no future, there’s no past, in the present nothing lasts
Lately someone’s missing from now on

The mystery that no one knows
Where does love go when it goes?
The mystery that no one knows
Where does love go when it goes?

 

Goodbye

While the internet will be flooded by tributes…I don’t have the words to express my sadness…people like him have touched the lives of millions though their music…and when someone kills themselves or dies…you realise two things…one…life is very short…too short to waste away being angry…on holding grudges and thinking about revenge and two…no one’s life is perfect…who knows what your close ones are going through…do not be fooled by their fake smiles…if you see someone in pain, help them. You may save a life.

Rest in peace Chester…you have left  void in this world that no one will ever be able to fill. I hope you are reborn as a musical genius again and perhaps then, I will watch you perform someday…listening to your songs when I was a teenager gave me so much comfort…I cannot even express it in words…I do not even understand why I feel so sad…thank you for sharing your beautiful talent with us…

Over and out…

Fare thee well!!

People come and go,

Only a few will stay,

The ones who tug at your heart strings,

The ones you never want to go away.

 

Life has its own plans…

People drift apart,

They say you should not be afraid of letting go,

Someone else will come and heal your heart…

 

Yet as you grow older,

Time flies so fast…

You’ll find yourself reminiscing

About the days in the past…

 

Your first friend who taught you how to cross your t’s,

Your friend in high school, who always cheered you on…

Your friends from college…when life was just a ball,

Your work friends…where have most of them gone?

 

All you have is memories in the end…

Who decides who stays or who leaves?

To the ones who stay – thank you…

For the rest, my heart silently grieves.

 


 

Value your self worth. Give and don’t expect anything in return. If someone hurts you, learn from it and when the time comes, forgive them. Forgiveness is a way to set yourself free…unburden your heart. No matter how much you love someone, if they make you feel bad about yourself, perhaps its time to move on. They aren’t bad people – they are just not the type you need to be around. Remember, you are a reflection of the people you surround yourself with.

 

 

 

 

 

Melody – Part 3

For Part one – click here

For Part two – click here


He rubbed his eyes, he was so sleepy.

Farming wasn’t easy.

Oh yes, the hottest jock on the block was now your average run-of-the-mill farmer. But he liked this life. The smell of the mud on his hands, good physical hard work, sweat pouring down his back as he walked up and down his fields, talking to his crops…

Yes, he talked to his crops. People would think he was plain loco if they knew what he was doing but it was something which Jane had taught him. He smiled at a particular memory.


‘Your house is so green.’ He looked around admiringly. ‘How did you manage to grow such a fine garden in this heat?’

Jane smiled,’I have a little secret, I talk to my plants’.

He snorted,’Yeah right.’

Jane’s eyes went wide,’No, I do. I reallly do!! Last year, they were wilting and not doing well despite me trying everything so I started talking to them and look! Healthy as can be’

He gave her a suspicious look. Soon, both of them cracked up at how ridiculous she sounded.


He looked at his watch. It was 6 PM.

Wearily, he drove back to his house and sat in front of the computer. There was a mail from her. He’d received it a few weeks ago but he hadn’t opened it. Maybe it was time. It was a link to a video.

‘ Hey you…..I’m sorry I couldn’t attend your mother’s funeral…I’m so sorry.’ 

He paused the video to look at Jane, with little Jean propped up on her knee. Andy was no where in the picture. Maybe he never had been. He clicked on play again.

‘ But Jean and I..’

‘BABY JANE’, protested the little girl as Jane smiled, ‘I stand corrected, Baby Jane and I have prepared something for you. Hope this will cheer you up.’

Jane took a guitar in her hands and played the same song for him which he had sent to her a few years ago, while her daughter danced in front of her.

The Jane he knew was tone deaf so he knew the amount of effort she would have put into it. He replayed the video again…and then once more. He sniffed, trying to suppress the lump in his throat.

Her love was in that melody. It had always been there. It was still there. Despite everything. Despite him not being able to give her what she had wanted so many years ago, despite her being married for years, despite her raising a beautiful child, she still had enough love left in her for him. He walked outside to the porch and looked at the sky, softly humming to himself…coming to terms with the fact that life wasn’t always perfect, life wasn’t always fair and how lucky he was to have one person who loved him no matter what.  She was a fool, but it was ok. The world could do with some more fools like her.

Tears welled up in his eyes again but he didn’t care. It was worth it.


The End.

Melody – Part 2

For Part 1 click here:


‘I’m baby Jane!’

My five-year old daughter looked at me defiantly. For some reason, she hated her name. I’d named her Jean…yes, I’d played around with the alphabets in my name but I liked it. She didn’t. Apparently some poor kid in the kindergarten class got whacked on the head for calling her Jean instead of baby Jane and that infuriated her.

I smirked. My daughter was a lot like me…she spoke what was on her mind and didn’t feel bad about letting people know when she was happy, sad or just plain angry.

Baby Jane idolised me. And as far as I was concerned…she was the only good thing in my life. Andy and I…we were still together, don’t get me wrong. To the world – we were the perfect couple. But he knew…like I did…that we weren’t.

The front doorbell rang.

Baby Jane ran across the room to open the door knob. It was Michael. My music teacher. Oh yes, I’d started taking lessons. Music…was the other thing that brought me joy. Maybe to my little girl as well as she used to sit on the couch and watch us practise with rapt attention.

‘Mrs A! How’s it goin’??’

Michael was a college school student and an expert at the guitar. He was also my neighbour’s son. One day I’d heard him play and I’d walked across to his house. I still remember his surprise.


‘You are good at playing the guitar’ I had announced this statement very loudly when he’d opened the door. Perhaps I’d scared the poor kid.

He was startled but recovered quickly, ‘Uh yes?’

‘Can you teach me?’ I bit my lip.

‘Uhhh…’ he looked a little lost. Bloody teenager.

‘Can you teach me how to play this….’ I fumbled around in my purse and took out my phone to play the melody that I’d been sent three years ago.

‘Wow.’ Michael stroked his goatee and grinned,’Sure Mrs. A…that is beautiful but it will take some time for..’

‘ You start at 4 PM tomorrow my house.’ I interrupted him and walked away. Hell, I liked to make an impression.


To be continued…..

 

 

Climate Change & the Paris Agreement

Woke up this morning to read the news which I thought was going to happen anyway. The US backing out of the Paris agreement. People shouldn’t be surprised – look at this image.

Image result for donald trump paris agreement meme

What else do you expect a man like him to do? 

But what exactly is the Paris agreement? A lot of people are talking about it but not a lot of them know what exactly the agreement entails. Why is it a big deal?

First of all – let’s get one fact straight. Unlike what Trump and a lot of other people may believe – climate change is happening. Global temperatures are rising, believe it or not and every day makes a difference. And if we don’t take care – in our own small ways as individuals, collectively as nations and universally, as humans – we are just harming the planet that we call our home.

The Paris agreement was a big deal because it was the first of its kind. 195 countries ratified the agreement where they agreed on the following: (source: Wikipedia)

(a) Holding the increase in the global average temperature to well below 2 °C above pre-industrial levels and to pursue efforts to limit the temperature increase to 1.5 °C above pre-industrial levels, recognizing that this would significantly reduce the risks and impacts of climate change;

(b) Increasing the ability to adapt to the adverse impacts of climate change and foster climate resilience and low greenhouse gas emissions development, in a manner that does not threaten food production;

(c) Making finance flows consistent with a pathway towards low greenhouse gas emissions and climate-resilient development.

In a nutshell – we need to control the increase in global temperature below 2 degrees C if we want to save our Planet.

Trump said that the deal was bad for the US and wasn’t in its best interest. I don’t know the details of what the US planned to do – but the fact of the matter is – he’s doing it for the wrong reasons. Because Obama pushed for it. Because a lot of people who voted for Trump/funded Trump will lose money and jobs if the deal comes through. Which is crap cos there are plenty of jobs that will be created through introducing renewable forms of energy. 

Sure, the world might lose out on a lot of funding from the US which would have helped them to introduce clean, green and renewable forms of energy…this is especially with respect to the developing world.

But the world doesn’t need to get depressed. The rest of the world will continue to try their best to stick to the agreement. Also – the US itself is divided regarding Trumps decision. The states of Washington, California and New York are already going ahead with what they call a Climate Alliance where they will continue to take measures to control emissions and introduce renewable energy across their states. 

Tesla’s Elon Musk and Disney’s Robert Iger quit Donald’s presidential council after this decision. Good for them. But I doubt this would make a difference. He’s too thick-skinned and worried about himself to care about what anyone else might do.

The thing is – like Angela Merkel said – Germany cannot rely on the US or the UK and nor can the rest of the world. There may soon be a new world order. We just need to realize that the US is no longer going to be the so-called Global watchdog and we need to take things into our own hands. If anything – it will help the rest of the world to grow up and for countries like India – to increase their international presence in the global market.

I’m not a big fan of talking about politics nor is my post intended to infuriate people – this is just what I feel about it. For once, I am happy that I am not an American and that I am an Indian. Our PM might have been a controversial figure but he has more common sense than Trump does.

Over and out.