Follow Me! Please…pretty please?


Follow me.

Are you on Instagram? Follow me. See my pictures, do they make you jealous? Did you see that I went to Spain? And saw a broadway show in America? And trekked all the way up to Machu Pichu?

My life is amazing. I am sure you want to be in my shoes. ‘What a lucky girl’…I can always imagine you thinking that to yourself every time you double tap on my posts.

Follow me.

Did you see the amazing close up I posted on Facebook right now? I used just a few filters to disguise my pimples and scars and make my hair look glossier and thicker. The angle of my face is perfect. I look like some super model. And yes, I didn’t post a full length picture because then you can see my love handles and that isn’t a very nice sight…I am not proud of my body – so you are not allowed to see that.

But love handles aside…

Aren’t I a beauty? Follow me! Add me as your friend – watch me post about how much I love my DH (dear husband). Oh yes, we fight everyday and I hate his guts but it is essential that he and the rest of my 997 friends know that I love him, our love was meant to be, he is the best thing in my life. Yes, he and you need to know it – every single day. See how happy we are. You can’t see through our fake smiles and the red eye caused by the flash maybe hides how dead I feel inside.

Oh yes, I am living the life so follow me.

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This is a reminder to all who are guilty of this – start living an authentic life and stop pretending to be who you are not, stop it – with your filters and your over sharing and all the fake pretentious shit you are up to. Those who know you, can see right through you and those who do not – well, I don’t think they even care.

A very cynical ladyhawk signs off

 

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